Saturday, December 02, 2006
i know Your ways are higher than mine when eeleen drops by with chocolate and water when i'm studying at westcoast macs tho her schedule's tight. more importantly, i know Your ways are higher when in those brief 20-30 mins, she shares the very lessons i'm struggling to learn and how You've been shaping her, and i know You're telling me that i'm on the right track, that You really do have it all under control, and that i've gotta take control for my feelings and then surrender them to You. (oddly enough Cheryl, doesn't that sound like what dear old and well..now dead, Satir would say? at least the first bit? about owning, managing, and enjoying ur feelings? grin.)i know Your ways are higher when i get to share the very things i'm struggling to learn with someone else who's struggling to learn why u let her go thru things that involve such difficult choices and when it's so hard to say no and accept that it's a no.i know Your ways are higher when i struggle with the decision of whether to go for JPM or not tho i'm only half done studying for my paper the next day...then Mils "inspires" me and i "inspire" cheryl in turn to take that step of faith and obedience to put God first and trust that He'll be honored and pleased : ) and then i find out shoeee did the same last nite : ) and among other people, i bump into aunty joy as i was rushing off last night and she says she'll pray. and when she says she'll pray...i know aunty joy prays : ) i know Your ways are higher than mine when i spend ridiculously long doing ONE reading the day before my exam and not understand why the heck i was so slow but tell myself not to beat myself up over it. then when the exam question reads "select one of the articles and discuss...." there in that moment, i can but realize that You knew...and i'm amazed.i know Your ways are higher than mine when i decide to do a very "un-eunice" thing and heck the ton left to do and take a night off. went to watch Childaid with lav and tho we both agreed that tt one concert alone far exceeded our quota of classical music for the decade, i haven't laughed that hard or that long in awhile. and i felt alive again. haha i know it sounds drama..but really. a break and stolen time (as lav calls it) with the best of company does wonders. and of course, the conversation that ensued at foong seng till midnight was even better. thanks for the night out babe : )but perhaps, most surely i know Your ways are higher than mine when all else loses its meaning and significance in light of You, when i stop striving, when i stop struggling, and when i worship You in spirit and in truth. and it's when i'm worshipping You so, that i get a glimpse of Your ways...and then i can but conceed that...they're just still so much higher! that You are so much bigger, that You're unchanging, that You're my solid Rock, and that You're my Father! : )
